UNDERSTANDING THE USER AND DEPENDENCY

You may never have had a problem with drugs or alcohol, but perhaps you’ve had a health problem such as high blood pressure. Your doctor gave you strict instructions about what to do to prevent stroke or heart attack. Get more exercise. Cut way back on your salt intake. Take the medications prescribed.

You might respond to this medical advice in a couple of different ways. At first, you are afraid, and you quickly form a determination to control the disease. You might go home and throw away all the peanuts and potato chips, and dust off the exercise bike. You exercise everyday. You take your pills. Then you go to a barbecue and the sausages smell so good. A little salt won’t make that big a difference, you say. Or your feet start to hurt, and the bike pedals feel so hard. Better not work out for a while. Or you don’t have the energy that you used to, and your sex life isn’t so good. Must be the damn pills. You may fight the urge to slack off and win for a while, but more likely you will wage many battles over a long time until you make changes you can stick with. Sometimes these changes are a less-than-ideal compromises between doctor’s orders and your not-so-perfect self.
Your friends will understand, because they do the same thing. One friend has diabetes and never checks her blood sugar, relying instead on some intuitive sense of when the levels are too high, at which point she cuts back on carbohydrates. She says that life is too short to worry all the time. Another friend spends more than he earns and has a huge credit card debt. He vows to leave the card at home when he goes out, but if there is a sale on . . . well, that’s different, right?
This is how life works. You identify a problem and try to deal with it in your own way, without hard and fast rules. You make compromises with reality. You are sometimes more and sometimes less honest with yourself about how you’re doing. You are more likely to make a positive change if you have some control over how you do it. And if you do, it tends to be a way that’s manageable for you. That’s harm reduction. It’s the same for problems with alcohol and other drugs as it is for any other problem that necessitates a behaviour change.
Naturally, this puts you in a difficult position. On the one hand, how can you allow the person you are concerned about to be in charge of his or her life when things are clearly out of control? On the other hand, you’re not really in charge of anyone but yourself anyway.
There are a few things about drug use that you might want to consider while you’re trying to address the harm that’s being caused in your life. Understanding the perspective of the person with the drug problem can help you formulate your own plans.

• LISTEN
• LOOK FOR CUES - opportunities to talk
• BE AVAILABLE
• BE AWARE and let them know you care
• BE INFORMED